World War II — by Urban Dictionary

“Some of the World War II guys in ‘Call of Duty’ have, like, for­eign accents… what’s up with that?”

For all of you lazy ass stu­dents: Here is a brief review of  World War II by the Urban Dic­tio­nary. For more detailed infor­ma­tion go ask your 9^th grade his­tory teacher.

Ger­many invades Czecho­slo­va­kia.
Britain & France tell them to stop that bull­shit.
Ger­many invades Poland.
(Rus­sia also invades Poland from the other side: every­body for­gets this.)
Britain & France declare war. This is the ‘offi­cial’ kick-off.
Italy, Bul­garia, Hun­gary, & Roma­nia all join the Ger­man side. (Every­body for­gets the last three.)
Axis forces go through Europe like vin­daloo through a colostomy.
Nazis exter­mi­nate Jews, gays, gyp­sies, & the dis­abled. (every­body remem­bers the jews but for­gets the rest.)
UK holds out.
Rus­sia & the USA don’t do shit.
Entire divi­sions of Dan­ish, Bel­gian, Dutch, Nor­we­gian, French & Ser­bian vol­un­teers join the Axis armies & SS. (every­body for­gets this & to lis­ten to them now, they were all in the fuck­ing resis­tance, which must have been MASSIVE.)
Axis forces invade Rus­sia. Sud­denly the Rus­sians don’t think it’s funny any more.
Japan joins the Axis & bombs Pearl Har­bor.
Sud­denly the US doesn’t think it’s funny any more.
The USA tools up the world, ’cause it’s got more fac­to­ries than every­body else put together, & they’re out of bomber range.
Axis runs out of steam in Rus­sia, cause Russia’s enor­mous & bloody freez­ing.
Allies invade on D-Day… 5 land­ings: 2 British, 2 Amer­i­can, 1 Cana­dian. (every­body for­gets the Cana­di­ans.)
Hitler ends up smoul­der­ing in a ditch. Rus­sians find the body & con­firm he only had one ball. Seri­ously.
The US decides invad­ing stuff is a pain in the ass and invents the atom bomb instead. Drops two buck­ets ‘o sun­shine on Japan.
Rus­sians steal half of Europe.
UK’s spent almost every penny it had.
US starts telling every­body how it was all about them, & 64 years later is still doing so.